There was a long stretch of time, roughly 3 years, where I only touched my camera a handful of times to go out and shoot. My biggest excuse as too why was that I was too focused on work, and that I don't have the energy to drive into the mountains. This isn't too say that I didn't like photography anymore during that time, I remember still watching all my favorite photographers on YouTube, seeing others I follow post amazing things on Instagram, and hear about the exciting trips friends went on and wishing I could be out there. But each time I would get the itch, I would tell myself, "I have work in the morning", "I'm not feeling it today", "I don't have enough time off". But that wasn't why I didn't go. Deep down I knew that I just wasn't confident in my abilities.
I wish I could say what caused it, but my leading theory is seeing other peoples work, and instead of getting inspired or analyzing it, I would compare it to my own and shoot my photos down saying they just aren't as good. This was the worst place I could be. What started as going out, shooting, editing, then self criticizing; quickly became a game of having the itch to go out, but shooting myself down because the conditions aren't favorable, I don't have enough time, I don't have a location picked out, or the weather is bad so I'll go tomorrow or next week. Then because I didn't go outside to shoot, I instead surfed the web looking at other peoples photos, thus continuing the cycle.
I remember back in April 2022, a couple of weeks before I was moving from Colorado to Virginia, I was going to make the effort to go to my favorite spot and take some photos at sunrise. As I was driving up the canyon, I would constantly look to the sky to see if there were any clouds so that I would get some beautiful oranges, pinks, and reds on them as the sun rose. As I reached the crest of the hill, I was able to see clearly out west into the canyon and to my dismay there was very little cloud cover. I remember thinking of just turning around since it didn't turn out as I hoped. But I stuck with it only because at this point I had been driving for close to an hour and was now only a few minutes away.
A couple of photos taken from my phone that morning
After parking and trekking down to the creek, I found myself face to face with one of my favorite scenes and some excitement in my bones. I got my camera all setup with a composition I liked at the time and waited for the morning sun to rise as well as my excitement. Clouds even made an appearance. I was hopeful that I would get something good. The sun rose, the light came and went, and I was there taking it all in, thinking I came away with an image I could actually love again. Then I imported it to Lightroom.
I hated it.
Everything came flooding back. All the negative thoughts and comparisons made their way back as I was face to face with my image on the big screen. I didn't even bother to edit it, I was so overwhelmed with all the harsh criticism I was giving my self that I just couldn't continue.
A couple weeks later I got busy with moving out east and getting settled at a new job and the cycle of reasons to not go out and shoot continued, this time with the added, "It's not Colorado, its not the same" attitude. I did go out to shoot a couple of times, but I was just not feeling as inspired or excited, and not getting photos I was too happy with.
Then in November of 2023, I had decided to take a long weekend off of work for my birthday. I knew I wanted to spend one of the mornings going out to shoot sunrise and capturing some good fall colors, so I spent some time looking around on Google Maps and found a small park along the James River. I didn't have any particular shot in mind, I was going in completely blind. I was excited. The morning came, I got up early, grabbed my gear, and went on my way. At one point during the drive, when I had a clear view of the sky I couldn't help myself but to look up and see if there were any clouds. There weren't. I again felt immediately discouraged and thought, "Why is there never any cloud coverage", but I continued on, given I wasn't too far away. Next came the bridge to cross over the river. As I was crossing it, I turned to my left and saw a wall of fog completely covering the river. I lost it.
I was beyond excited to see this fog, I had always wanted to take photos in fog just to get some moody and atmospheric shots. I could not stop smiling. As I was driving down the road thats along the river I couldn't stop looking out towards the water looking for anything interesting to photograph. I made it to the parking lot, grabbed my gear, and bolted for the shoreline. It was beautiful.
After a few minutes of a walking around I found a composition that I liked, so I got everything setup and began waiting for the light to come. As the minutes passed and the sun continued to rise, I began to notice that the light wasn't going to do what I had hoped it would, so instead I decided to do a quick panoramic shot since the whole scene was breathtaking.
I left my camera and walked a little bit downstream to see if there was anything else I could shoot since it was still golden hour and the light through the fog was amazing. I am so glad I did because I spotted a small group of birch trees on the other side of the river that were getting the perfect amount of golden light on them. I sprinted back to my camera, I was so afraid that since the fog was moving quickly, that the light on the trees would go away. I set up a composition with some rocks sitting in the river in the foreground, the trees in the distance, and the fog adding a bit of atmosphere. My excitement was through the roof after I pressed the shutter and saw the image on the screen of my camera. I immediately knew that it was going to be a new favorite.
This excitement continued when I got home and imported it into Lightroom to edit. It was even better than I thought seeing it on a bigger screen. I actually loved it. After 3 years I actually loved an image that I took. I loved the being out at the river and finding an image. I loved looking at it and editing it. I just loved it.
I love the stillness of the water, it gives a sense of calm. I feel that if it was any quicker that it would be too distracting and take away from the subject. The rocks anchor the image and help provide some context of the water. The leaves in the trees are all getting small glimpses of light and it really adds some contrast, especially on the left hand side of the frame where the branches are all in shadow. Then we have the stars of the show, the grouping of trees basking in all this morning sun. What I love the most about this perspective is that the trees are getting lit from the right hand side, leaving the left side of the trunk in darkness, adding to that contrast. Then we have the right side of the frame where we have more trees getting light on their trunks, but the fog is thicker here, therefore muting that light and making sure its not outshining the main group.
This photo makes me happy. This photo makes me feel more confident in my abilities as a photographer. This photo makes me want to pick my camera and go outside.
